Fish understand me! And I understand them! When did you get so mean? I heard you were supposed to be really nice. You’re just really mean right now. Yes, well, fish eat other fish. It’s natural. Fish tanks are unnatural. I have a very amazing transport technique, actually. And I am careful about where I put them. Fish need to be free, where they should be naturally. You won’t get it. No one ever gets it. I transferred from Québec, but most people think I come from England because of my accent. And I do come for England! But I’ve been all over the world. Anyway, Québec was where my last school was.

I don’t do any of that! Why would I want to hide your textbooks? I don’t even know where my own are. She is dead! Um, is this like…denial? I’m sorry. Maybe you’re delusional or something and I shouldn’t have brought it up, but no one at the Zoo said that you were delusional or anything. Just that you drop their plates sometimes. Unless that was a metaphor. Um, I’m sorry. Maybe I shouldn’t have-I’m sorry.

I don’t- how can fish understand you? And I’m not being mean, it’s just a fact that you can’t really talk to fish. You’re saying it like anything manmade is unnatural. Which it’s not. Wait, you have a transport technique? As in, you actually steal fish from the acquarium to get them out? Oh, that’s cool that you seem to have travelled the world already at your age. 

Well, I’d rather you do that than play those sick jokes on me! You can’t just tell someone their mother is dead when she’s not! It’s not fucking denial, my mum’s alive. She’s making dinner right this second. Okay, maybe you’re the delusional one here. Because now you sound like there is really something wrong with you.


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